Yesterday

20 05 2010

Yesterday was kind of a dark day for me, very depressing and my post reflected that.  My boyfriend and I were fighting all day and I was stressed out about his lack of concern for his own health and I let it get the best of me.  The thing about fighting with someone you love and have known for awhile is that they know EXACTLY what to say to get a rise out of you.  Or in this case, exactly what to say to break the dam that had been holding back all my psychological and emotional stress and cause a breakdown.  I cried harder yesterday than I have cried in a long time.  Probably since my grandma died.  It was one of those loud, wailing, snot filled cries that uses up and entire box of Kleenex kind of cries.  I was so embarrassed, I was certain that one of my neighbors was going to knock on the door of my apartment to see what was going on.

I think my boyfriend felt bad that he had pushed so hard and he let me cry it out while he tidied up our apartment, before picking me up and making me take a hot shower to relax and clean myself up.  It was a sweet gesture, but honestly I would have rather he just held me and apologized (which he never did).  He then ordered pizza and cracked open a bottle of red wine while we played board games.  And I’m ashamed to say that I probably consumed WAAAAAYYYYY too many calories via pizza and wine than I should have.

We never talked about the fight, even though I tried.

Anyways…back to your regularly scheduled health and fitness blog…

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